Diario de klaymates

I started the AltShift diet protocol yesterday. I plan to keep this up as my lifelong way of eating.

Starting weight: 121.8 kg
Last Week: 116.2 kg
Today's weight: 115.5 kg

Things I've done well
--drank lots of water
--logged every single day, even when it felt embarrassing (sis in law over, ate too much food, etc)
--hit step goal most days!
--four days of NR Fighter's Codex under my belt (so. sore.)

Last week's goals:
--35,279 / 35,000 steps ... woo! Step goal hit 5/7 days
--98 / 105 active minutes (actually more if you count last night's yoga session I didn't log)
--5 / 7 nights of legs up the wall pose

Goals for this week
--5,250 steps a day
--7 more days of NR Fighter's Codex
--5-10 minutes of legs up the wall pose each night (one more week to make it stick)
--dedicated 10 minutes of stretching and foam rolling after NRFC workouts

Last two nights were higher cal than I wanted, but I am glad I was able to enjoy the cake and pull the reins in after. And, that delicious, sinful concoction I came up with is finally gone. (NEVER make cream cheese frosting with a box of after eight mints melted and whipped into it...JUST SAVE YOURSELF!)

Actually, really glad that I made it through a couple days of junkier eats and higher cals. It makes me feel like I can do the thing from time to time without throwing my hands in the air and saying SCREW THIS and diving back into binge cycles and whatnot. Because today my head is in a good place. I'm ready to eat a little more fiber and a little less sugar, and keep moving forward. Plus, if that is the worst damage Tom could do, yay!

Mother in law has birthday Sunday. It was requested I make my homemade corndogs for the shindig. There will be other treats. The same folks who like to point out how many cals are in something I'm eating, then tease me for taking less food will be there. Going to have myself a corndog, a bite or two of whatever cake is there, maybe a diet pop and call it a day. "They" can just deal with it.

It's weird how sometimes it feels like some people around me love to point out my size, but don't want me to actually be healthier. This is one of these things I'm going to have to learn to let go. Their power games don't get to dictate how I live my life and how long I get to live it!

Have a great weekend FS Friends. I hope those of you in the NE US will pick up on these Spring vibes I'm sending with love from Switzerland.

Did Day One of the Neila Rey Fighter's Codex yesterday. Tried to jump out of bed this morning and was so sore I had to spend five minutes just recovering from that foolishness. So. Sore. I also have a trigger point the size of a large marble (the shooters? the big ones?) on my right rib cage. Going to need to give that some tough love with a lacrosse ball, I think.

Yesterday I caught myself starting to mindlessly shove food in my face because I felt awful. I had two bites of food leftover on a kids plate and a bite of mashed potatoes from the fridge when I realised.....eating food is not going to change my situation. So I stopped. I complained a lot. But I did alright.

And when I really, really, really wanted to stuff my gob last night during Castle...I didn't. I thought about how well I've been doing, how I want to keep this streak going, how I want to make real changes. And I was a bit grumpy about it, but it worked.

Hit my step and activity goals for the past three days. Feeling good about that. Feel like a dork when I'm walking circles around the dining table or marching in place with my arms pumping while I watch tv, but it's getting done. And it still counts, right? Marching in place with high knees for 20+ minutes is hard work!

Legs up the wall pose is amazing. Why did I ever stop doing it? Man, if you are ever going to do one yoga pose every day FS Friends, choose this one. I'm building the habit to do it 5-10 minutes each night before bed. It leaves my legs feeling so wonderfully refreshed, and no horrible muscle twitching keeping me awake after I hit the sack.

Really. Legs up the wall pose. Totally good stuff. Also, husband threw away barcode for some mixed crackers, but I saw the nutritional info from the day before. Since it's not in the data base, for some reason it won't show in my recent foods and let me add again. Oh well. But in the spirit of logging *everything*, 200 extra kcal for today's grand total of 1786.

Starting weight: 121.8 kg
Last Week: 118.3 kg
Today's weight: 116.2

Things I've done well
--drank lots of water
--logged every single day wooo!
--was more active and proactive in stretching
--made connections to build up my own special little FS jedi counsel

Last week's goals:
--23,606 / 35,000 steps
--57 / 105 active minutes
--7 / 7 days logged

Goals for this week
--5,000 steps a day
--15 active minutes a day
--5-10 minutes of legs up the wall pose each night

Had a very rough start to my day today, after a difficult night. My youngest is now climbing out of his crib, and it struck us by surprise. We weren't ready to deal with the nighttime shuffle of back in bed back in bed just quite yet. And then this morning, well just stupid things with apartment management. Felt very ganged up on, tried to share my feelings with husband's mother, she cut me short trying to do the whole "oh well just don't feel that way!", I got upset and she withdrew. She sat and listened to me but I could tell it wasn't any good. I let my emotions get the better of me and showed I was upset, and she does not do emotions very well. They seem to make her uncomfortable, so she politely pulls in and listens, but the opportunity for connection was lost.

But wow rambling, all that to say. Rough start to the day but feeling okay now. Doing my best to keep moving forward. Pulling my heart along today feels a bit like trying to reel in a fish. It's working...but there's definitely resistance. I think I'm out of the danger zone, though.

All in all I think this week was better. I'm more mindful of my eating, even more so since reading another FS journal entry about enjoying the one bite of a favorite treat. It helped remind me that I am able to do that, and I can be aware of how nice that treat is, yeah man it's so yummy!, thanks for the bite, I am satisfied.

I'm also very excited to be doing the Break the Habit challenge starting next week. I think it's just what I need to get both my step and activity goals checked off my list! I have a plan that might annoy the hell out of my husband (and myself!) the first couple of days, but I hope it just becomes second nature eventually to move for a portion of every waking hour.

Well, really I don't know what else to report for the week. Actually feeling hopeful for the weeks ahead. Actually feeling like maybe this time, I'm going to work through the things I need to work through. That little hurt girl inside me isn't going to grow if I keep shutting her up with food. I have to let her know it's okay, and she is loved, and maybe someday I can even tell her that myself.

Have a great weekend FS Friends! TGIF